2024- International Nomad
Hey guys, here’s a little update. Not the positive and happy story I’d like for it to be, but here’s an update on how my 2024 has been going- if and only IF you are curious.
Ever since my car broke down, I’ve thoroughly missed being a nomad. Although it’s nice couch surfing with friends or staying at my parents house for free while I figure out my next trip, I really did miss the independence and solitude of my nomadic lifestyle.
Although I often bounce around the same places when I am resting/ recuperating from my travels, I still consider myself a nomad. The nomad life is super fun and interesting when I’m mentally stable and in the carefree mental state only wanting to spread love, positivity, and learn more about the Universe. Being thrown into it feels a bit…chaotic. There’s a fine line between being a nomad and being homeless. And that line depends on your mindset towards the situation and your financial responsibility.
On a normal basis, I’m pretty responsible enough to have enough savings for “in case of emergency” and to spend frugally. For certain reasons I can’t mention, I have been a bit over budget and have been trying to make sure I don’t dig into my savings too much but had to pay off some things resulting in me being a bit broke.
I thought, it’s fine. I’m staying at my parents house and will save up some more money. Which I was, while also having to take care of certain expenses so I wasn’t making much profit.
Living in society again, was quite draining and I could really feel the negative energy in the air- the existence of society itself. I wanted to return to nature and solitude, I missed it dearly and allotted some time for a small trip to Canada to visit a friend and try to see the eclipse.
Now there was some cosmic chaos, lots of different astrological events happening in this month. Other than the other many things going on in April, the two main were Mercury in retrograde in Aries and the two eclipses. There were lots of other things so this was a very intense time for a lot of people. My Mercury is in Aries and I felt everything so hard.
An emergency happened and I had to cancel my trip in Canada, although I was able to be there for a few days rather than 2 weeks. This emergency happened in Australia and I had to fly there immediately to be there for my loved ones. It was chaotic, I sacrificed multiple things in prayer that everything will be okay when I arrived. Before I even flew out to Australia, a huge drama happens within my blood-related family (my parents house) and me.
I’m literally already overwhelmed with the news from Australia and then on top of that I have a huge falling out OVER THE PHONE with my family who favours my older brother as he is the first son of a Chinese family and lives a more normal life than me. Unfortunately, this has resulted in me not being welcome at “home” anymore, leaving me with nowhere to come back to. I can’t even go retrieve my other travel stuff that I didn’t bring this trip because I wasn’t planning on being gone that long.
This falling out with my family is quite heavy and has take quite a toll on me and still is right now. Although the emergency I came for seems to be lightening up, I’m still burdened by suddenly not having a home. I’m eternally grateful for my friends that are housing me right now but I still feel bad and feel weird knowing I don’t have a homebase. If I was in the right mind and not also dealing with the emergency that happened, I’d probably be fine and just make the best of it. I’m still making the best of it in Australia but unfortunately I didn’t have time to grab any money and have been struggling to survive and not make my friends always taking care of me- I know it’s expensive for them too.
Other than the chaos and crying everyday about all the things going on at once, I am grateful and having as much fun as I mentally can with my friends. Although it feels like a distraction and I just come back to being sad; needing solitude, needing privacy, rest, comfort, and love. Since I am couchsurfing (which I normally love to do) I don’t have much privacy and I really need that right now so I haven’t been able to heal properly.
I am currently sleeping on the floor of my friends’ closet in a small house in the suburbs. I’m more than grateful to have a roof over my head. In normal days this would be more than enough but because of everything going on, I just want to be alone and in comfort where I can sit with my own feelings and address the current issues properly. I can’t afford my own place right now and I can’t work in Australia with a traveling visa. So I’ve been trying to figure out my next move; while feeling extremely lost. I’m so happy and grateful for the love and support and also having so many friends in Australia that can help me figure out my living situation. It just all feels so heavy right now.
Mentally, this is the lowest I’ve been in a while. I’m doing my best and trying to make the best of this overly negative situation. Energetic alchemy is not as easy right now since I’m so overwhelmed, but I am slowly trying my best to transmute this negative into a positive.
As of now, I don’t want to go back to America or anywhere near my family. I also have to stay close to Australia in case another emergency happens. So I’ll be bouncing around nearby countries- as an international nomad. Also, my birthday just passed and I wanted to make a post of 25 things I learned by 25 because my friend I’m staying with asked me for 5 things I learned by now, and I was on ROLL when I was typing and thinking about it but then my mental state went downhill again and I forgot what I was going to say. I will be happy to make that post when I can.
This birthday, supposedly a milestone was unfortunately not great at all for me and I wish I could have enjoyed it more. Although I’ve been crying all day and cried on my birthday (honestly this is normal), I did have a great time at the party my friends threw for me. I was overwhelmed with love and gratitude for all the lovely souls in my life and that came through even though I was mentally battling a war. I did also end up losing my phone in an Uber and cried all night but my best friend saved me. I was hoping after all the cosmic chaos the intensity would die down but it is still chaos.
On the bright side, I have lots of love and support, and a roof over my head. I was thrown into this so I am still frazzled and trying to get back up. But sending lots of love to everyone who is sending me positive energy and being there for me:)
Sending lots of love to you as well, all the way from Australia!:)